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  • Pri

Me time is and important factor when you are in a relationship.

Self love, and focus around your own well being is so important and is highly stressed around those who are single, or those who have recently come out of a relationship.

This is one thing you get thrown about a lot, and being single I can 100 vouch for the beauty behind 'Me time' whilst being single. But what about when you are in a relationship?

Looking back at my previous relationships, there were times I just wanted space and maybe didn't communicate this across properly. This sometimes lead to arguments and disagreements and sometimes I couldn't understand why my partner at the time wanted her own 'me time'. I know ask the question to everyone in a relationship, "how many times have you just wanted to tell your partner - I just need some space?"

And not in regards to breaking up, but just need some you time to do you?

Whether thats binging a few hours over the playstation or hitting the gym?

Whether its going for a drink or two with your boys/girls, or what about going for a meal with the family?

It could be a case where you just want to be alone, and might just be going for a walk through nature or just go for a drive alone at night?

When I look back, I remember doing this stuff and sometimes it created issues. Sometimes I was the one who created the issues when I was the one receiving the news.

So how do I tell my partner without causing a firework display?

Here are my 3 things to consider before you ask for that me time.

  1. Think about how your partner is going to receive the information

  2. Communicate this across so it is clear what you want and why you want it

  3. Be honest and explain the reasoning - when the time is right

Now in all honesty you may not need to do this but some partners may feel insecure so it is important to consider them before you act because despite the fact we want people to think the way we do, unfortunately we are all unique and different. Hence you might need to get the message across in a manner where your partner will understand and most importantly respect your honest approach to be upfront and ask for some time alone.

So before you have that conversation, one thing I've learned is maybe write a pretend dialogue to give you an insight of the reaction.

It sounds silly right but at least you can anticipate what will come up as a response, and then you can tailor your message to make sure it is communicated across effectively.

Essentially you are not trying to have a go at your partner, and youre not asking for them to just disappear, but you just need some time for you.

Maybe you have just had a bad day at work, or a friend has bothered you, maybe its an extended family issue and you just need a breather.

This is all fine, but subconsciously, your partner may feel otherwise so it is important you get the real message across in a manner where there is no further altercations.

Be honest and explain the reasoning before things escalate further. Be mindful that there will be a response but if you have planned beforehand and have communicated what you wanted and have said it where what your partner hears is exactly how you feel, you should be fine.

Its when you say something, and your partner hears something else is when problems arise, so be careful how you bring this message across.

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