Why not mix up your thought process from the offset. Maybe you'll smile more often about things like this guy?
How often do you think of the worst case scenario?
Lets be completelty honesty how often do you decide to not play ball based on what the ‘worst thing’ that could happen.
It ruins a lot of the plans right. It can sometimes stop you in your tracks because you have been hardwired to think of the "What if" from a negative perspective.
We've all been there. It sucks. Do any of the following ring any bells?
I wont speak to him/her because he/she might already have a partner and will reject me. It’ll make things awkward.
I am not going to say what my problems are to my manager because if I do they will think I’m not competent.
I am not going to ask for help because it makes me look weak.
I am not going to going to give it my all because no one else is bothered, it isn’t going to make any difference.
I am not going to invest because there is no guarantee that there will be any results.
Any of these slightly accurate. Believe me I hear you loud and clear.
I've been there before. But by having this negative outlook, nothing ever happens, or things may happen but not in the way we really want them too.
So let's flip the script.
Let's start by writing something new.
Let's take the first few steps in rewiring this mind of yours. You never know it could add some value?
It could change the game completely. And in the words of my good friend Drake, "you can thank me later".
So what were going to do is visualise what would happen in the best case scenario. Not the worst case anymore but the best case.
By changing the vocabulary we will replay these scenarios:
Speaking to them might be the best thing that happens to me because they might be single and possibly wont reject me. They might find me cute. They may want me as a friend and that’s okay. This could be everything I have been asking for...
Speaking up in the office will let my manager know the stress I have been undertaking recently. They may provide me more support, send me on a training programme, or take some of the weight off my shoulders by pushing back the deadline. This would help me big time with everything that I've going on right???
By asking for help, I get the results I really really really want and people look at me as being strong for admitting that I require assistance. It encourages people in my circle to do the same thing and be phenomenal. I know of a few friends that could do with that assistance.
By giving it my all, might encourage my team to dig deeper too – maybe we win, maybe we lose, put the result aside, the team moral improves and long term this is going to pay off.
The best thing about investing is that there may or may not be a guarantee. We wont know until we try. If we play it safe or go all out, we control the risk we want to take but I know If I invest I will be committed and that’s what I’ve been missing. Commitment and accountability.
So really sit with this for a minute. Think about it. What are the scenarios you have been avoiding taking action on and flip the script. What else could you be doing moving forward to go and achieve the impossible. When you can rewire your mind the worst case scenario may be a motivator. But overall the mentality improves from being fixed to being in a growth mindset.